Life has been, in a word, busy. I don’t know how or why, but every moment had something planned. I was worn out, exhausted, extended beyond what was healthy. But it was a ladies meeting! Of like minded people! And dinner with friends beforehand, that could very possibly include coffee. I couldn’t resist. I just couldn’t!
I should have.
Tuesday morning, after getting to bed late and fighting for space in my bed all night because a sweet little cuddler joined me in my slumber during the night, I was spent. I woke up longing for bedtime. That’s never a good sign.
When my tutor arrived, I was laying on the couch trying to nap. Trying to change my attitude.
We started class, and I wanted to, I needed to, start with prayer. In Chinese. Y’all. This is hard. I can mess up my daily talking and laugh it off, but I was talking to the Father. I don’t want to screw it up. I don’t want to run out of words and have a witness for that.
In my exhausted state, I honestly didn’t even think about it. I bowed my head, my hair falling to cover my face, and called out.
I said, “I’m very tired and I can’t do this alone. Please come to my class.”
And I cried.
Every local word spoken came from my heart. The grammar and pronunciation, I am sure, was a train wreck. I’m not even sure my tutor understood what I was saying, but I know she felt it. And the most amazing part,
He heard me and He came.
My tears dried up, and His joy started to bubble. We talked about heavy things and He pushed me forward. Instead of being annoyed with my tutor’s child (who was with us in class), I saw her the way her mama does and I was proud to know her. To be a part of her life. These things are a direct answer and help from the One who loves me.
All day, I kept reflecting on how he turned my fear and hesitancy into something beautiful. Into something I won’t soon forget. How He hears in ALL languages. How He loves ALL people. How we are ALL in the same body, serving the same Master, for the same purposes.
Eyes opened wide, He met me here. In China. At my table. With my sister.